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All reviews - Movies (157) - TV Shows (4) - Books (2)

Underrated Psycho-Horror

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 19 August 2013 05:44 (A review of The Broken)

British filmmaker Sean Ellis' 2008 horror film, "The Broken," is a seriously underrated, twisted little puzzle-box of a movie that refuses to let you go and will inspire discussion after the credits have rolled.

Sure, it rips concepts from other horror films (parallels to "The Shining" run throughout) and doesn't contain as many scares as it should, but "The Broken" is so much better than other films of it's kind and deserves more attention than it gets.

Radiologist Gina McVey ("Game Of Thrones"'s Queen Bi**h and resident brother-f**ker, Lena Headey) drives home from work one day to see her double drive past her. Horrified and intrigued (and not clever enough to leave freaky s**t like this alone,) Gina follows the woman, only to lose her.

Gina comes home to find that something's changed. Her French boyfriend Stephan (Melvil Poupaud) is a stranger to her, lights flicker, mirrors break, something lurks in the attic, and Gina's doctors and family increasingly begin to believe that she's going insane. Don't worry! This isn't a another insanity story.

In some ways this is a typical horror-thriller- stairs creak, the wind shrieks, and seemingly no one can be trusted in this dark environment descended from a J-Horror film. But in other ways, it's anything but a typical horror film. Definitely a movie that makes you rely on your imagination and your mind rather than shocks, pouring guts and intestines, or sexploitation.

Lena Headey is really good in this, and the guy who plays her father, Richard Jenkins, is always good so it's no surprise when he turns up a nice performance here. "The Broken" also contains one of the scariest nightmare sequences I've seen.

The ending is abstract and leaves a lot of loose ends just waiting to be interpreted, but it's better to do brain work than to be hit over the head with the twist. This movie does what horror movies should do- tap into your primal anxiety rather than throw bile and guts into your face until you get sensory overload.

Like the projectile diarrhea from "The Human Centipede II," the modern horror film doesn't try to scare us as such, it tries to make us lose our cookies by being bloody and transgressive. And don't get me started on those weak PG-13 horror film remakes "Disturbia," "The Invisible," "The Last f**king Exorcist" (well, that wasn't a remake, but it was still pretty banal. If you're a fan of tricky horror, give this one a try.


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Cheesy But Fun

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 19 August 2013 12:50 (A review of They Live)

"They Live" is cheddar cheese, Swiss cheese, Brie Cheese, topped by a great terrible performance by pro wrestler "Rowdy" Roddy Piper as the unnamed shotgun-toting protagonist. "I'm here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." Yes you are, Rowdy, and never has such a line, so daringly uttered, struck such fear into the hearts into cadaver-faced extra-terrestrials as this.

Rowdy plays a wandering laborer, who finds himself living in a little shanty-town in LA. When police storm the place, Roddy finds a box of sunglasses. One look through a pair of these sunglasses, and Roddy can see that everything's a lie... aliens have taken over the world right under our noses and are systematically brainwashing us with subliminal messages such as 'Obey,' Watch TV,' and my personal favorite, 'Marry and Reproduce.' And Rowdy Roddy's problems are just beginning.

"They Live" is a grade-B satire of Corporate America and the gap between the rich and poor in the U.S. It has a clever and funny premise, and the acting is predictably sub-par. There's a fight scene between friends that lasts forever. "Put on the sunglasses!" "No!" "Ugh!" Many may complain about Rowdy's questionable acting prowess, but I see him less as slumming than having fun with the role.

My mom hated this movie. She takes film too seriously. She thinks a motion picture needs devices such as a plot, acting, and character development. Silly woman. Anyway, this isn't as good as "Dead Alive," (A movie by Peter Jackson back when he was fun before he ruined himself with the "Lord of the Rings" trilogy,) but it's still some cheesy fun with some the most unscary aliens since the ewoks.

I really liked the dig director John Carpenter had at his critics at the end of the film Just wait for the alien on the news with the moral sensitivities. Maybe you have to be the the right mood to appreciate "They Live," but I sure as Hell did and I recommend this movie to people who like 'bad' movies.


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Not-Bad Tale of Triumph

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 18 August 2013 08:39 (A review of The Hammer)

I'll be the first to tell you that I'm no big fan of wrestling. I just can't get pumped up at the prospect of two muscly, angry-looking, sweaty boys/men sticking their testicles in each others' faces. So the human interest element of a wrestling story really has to involve me, or else the appeal is lost on me.

Well, "The Hammer" is no Aronofsky's "The Wrestler," but it still manages to be a pretty appealing 'underdog' story, sans "The Wrestler"'s devastating ending. Now inspirational underdog pic can be great "Billy Elliot," good "The Fighter," or just mediocre ("Front of the Class,") and "The Hammer" falls somewhere in the middle category.

Based on a true story, "The Hammer" follows Matt Hamill, a deaf athlete (played by Russell Harvard, who has the disability in real life,) who struggles throughout his youth for love, inclusion, and acceptance. As a child, Matt's grandfather Stan (Raymond J. Barry) denied him the right to learn sign language or participate in a school with other deaf children.

So guess what? Matt gets moved to the 'slow class' of a mainstream primary school, where the normal kids assume he's stupid- he can't hear, he can't talk, he doesn't respond to their taunts... until one day he does respond, knocking one of his victimizers to the ground after being bullied.

Matt grows into a strong, oxish youth who nevertheless remains tentative about social engagements. He also finds his calling in life... wrestling. When Matt fails at his wrestling scholarship, partially because of his inability to understand sign language (way to go, Gramps,) he must fight his fears and insecurities in order to achieve his dreams.

I'll admit- I kind of spaced out during the wrestling scenes, which weren't my forte. But despite the sentimentality, the tears, and the token inspirational moments, I was pleased with this film as a whole. It wasn't really anything new or special, but it was well-done.

First of all Matt was a likable characters- you felt for his failures, even if you knew he was going to succeed at the end. The Grandpa was a three-dimensional character, even if his motivations were not always clear. He made up for his shortcomings by by an overall good father figure to his grandson.

Matt's deaf girlfriend Kristi (also deaf actress Shoshannah Stern) was kind of blah... you couldn't really feel the chemistry between her and Matt, and her constant nagging at him to sign rather than speak was annoying, and never really got resolved.

"The Hammer" is an overall rather predictable movie that ends up inspiring you despite yourself. The acting is decent, the script strong, and the characters likable enough. It might be worth a watch if you can find it for a cheap rental, or if you like this sort of movie.


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Sick, Camp, Cult

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 18 August 2013 12:02 (A review of The Baby)

"The Baby" is a very weird 'cult classic' (their words, not mine) about a lady social worker who interferes with the matriarch's hold on a supremely dysfunctional family. The object of social worker Ann Gentry (Anjanette Comer)'s obsessions is 'Baby,' a full-grown man (or 'grown-ass man' to quote Will Smith in the so-so "Men in Black" sequel) who is kept in a crib and clad in diapers.

Ann seems to believe that the seemingly mentally handicapped fellow is simply the otherwise functional victim of too much negative reinforcement during his development (bad baby! Stop standing up!") To his sister Alba (Susanne Zenor,) Baby is a scapegoat, to his other sister, Germaine (Marianna Hill,) he is a plaything. But what exactly does the seemingly wholesome Ann want with Baby? What secret lies under the surface of her white bread exterior?

Trust me, this otherwise forgettable schlock-fest is all worth it for the explosively trashy end twist. I never saw that coming. Otherwise, this is an underwhelming distortion of maternal instincts and needs. Baby's mama wants desperately to coddle him, to protect him from the big bad world, but in doing so only makes it clear the nightmare of overprotection she's inflicted on him- Hell is in this house.

David Mooney's performance as the titular 'baby' is supremely unsettling- I'm quite positive that Mooney's voice has been replaced by the cooing and crying sounds of an actual infant, and it's nearly impossible to tell which of his antics are those of a child and which are the cravings of libidinous man.


At times in this strange story, I wondered if 'Baby''s limitations were all an act and if he was going to show his true colors on the unsuspecting Ann. Other times I thought Ann was pulling a fast one on the family and wanted Baby for some weird infantile sexual purpose. The scene of Mrs. Wadsworth ('Baby''s mother) rubbing his legs down with lotion was REALLY creepy. I was like... really? Who does that?

Overall, "The Baby" is an interesting exercise in trash filmmaking, but not really worth watching twice unless you get your kicks watching grown men toddle around and attempt to breastfeed off of attractive women. You know who you are. And I don't even want to know. On the other hand, for the rest of you, once might be too much. So long! Keep visiting, readers!


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Very Cute Story & Characters

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 17 August 2013 08:58 (A review of The Fox and the Hound)

Made in an era of animation before cartoons were watered down and robbed of their joy, emotion, and scariness (not including Pixar- we love you,) "The Fox and the Hound" is a great pick for the whole family. Set in a seemingly idyllic, 20th Century woodland environment, it chronicles, with love, tears, and laughter, the friendship between an orphaned fox and a adorable hound dog.

This forest home is not so idyllic if you're a fox like Tod (voiced by Kieth Coogan as a youngster and Mickey Rooney as a grown-up), who loses his mother to fanatical game hunter Amos Slade (voiced by Jack Albertson) and is adopted by the big-hearted Widow Tweed (Jeanette Nolan), who turns him into a docile house pet.

It is in these happy days that Tod meets Copper (voiced by Corey Feldman as a pup and Kurt Russell a a adult dog), a blood hound puppy who is the newfound property of Amos. Too happy and naive to know they're not supposed to be friends, Tod and Copper play together for a couple of heart warming scenes until reality sets in.

This wake-up call intrudes when Amos takes Copper and his old dog Chief (Pat Buttram) on a long hunting trip, which lasts them from Copper's puppyhood to the time when Copper is almost grown. Torn between his friendship with Tod and his desire to please his master, Copper finds himself at an impasse which leads to an emotional finale.

I'm not ashamed to say that I cried... a lot at the moments of sentiment in this animated tale. I'm told that I tried to watch this as a young child, only to go ballistic about five minutes in when Tod's mother is chased by dumb ol' Amos Slade with his hunting dog and his shotgun. Of course, I cried if it started to rain in a video, so don't compare the reactions of your youngsters with mine.

I think the characters of the stuttering bird and his pal would just as well have been absent. I also felt the romantic subplot was too predictable. The song Big Mama the maternal owl (Pearl Bailey) sings, "The Best of Friends," was heart-wrenching and effective, but the other songs were pretty forgettable.

Besides Copper and Tod, I liked Widow Tweed best (like a grandmother everyone should have) and Chief, Slade's ornery old hunting dog, because he reminded me of my old rottie mix Elissa. The typical "Disney" humor (i.e. slapstick) didn't always fit the somber plot, but there should be fun hijinks for the kiddies as well as high drama.

"The Fox and the Hound" is one of the few classic Disney movies I'd watch for my own enjoyment, or when I'm accompanied by a child (y'know, when "The Human Centipede" or it's sequel just won't do.) My sister loves foxes, so she couldn't get enough of Tod, and I wanted to pinch the flaps on Copper's unfortunately-animated wrinkly face. So long and happy watching!


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Overhyped

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 16 August 2013 07:52 (A review of The Boondock Saints)

"The Boondock Saints" is an extremely over-hyped vigilante thriller that contains no depth beyond it's initial macho revenge fantasy, but, despite moments of painful camp, doesn't have the sense to go all the way as a comedy. It would better serve as a satire on America's obsession with Machismo posturing and the view that violence is the best way to solve problems than the self-important bloodbath it becomes.

I'm not adverse to revenge movies, even extreme ones. "Taxi Driver" featured Travis Bickle blowing away pimps and thugs, but it was more of a character study than a vigilante movie. "God Bless America" trivialized violence, but it was a satire, and a good one at that. "Dead Man's Shoes" was a powerful statement on the consequences of violence.

I don't have any problem with violence in the media at all, except when it is portrayed as an easy way to solve real-life problems. People, I cannot stress this hard enough- there are consequences to violent retaliation and vigilante justice.

If this movie had taken a closer look at the psychological effects of murder on the perpetrators, it might have earned an extra star. But Connor and Murphy MacManus (Sean Patrick Flanery and Norman Reedus) treat their new vocation like a new video game.

Now that I'm done beating you over the head with my Liberal values, let's talk shop- "The Boondock Saints" is the story of the McManus twins, two Irish-Catholic brothers who, after killing two Russian Mobsters in self-defense, take is as a calling from God to clean the scum out of their crime-filled Boston home town, one criminal at a time.

The way they go about this is utterly unbelievable- they just purchase a bunch of guns and knives and off they go, blasting away thugs like they came straight out of "Duke Nukem." There's no depth to the McManus boys here- they don't have a thought in their heads other than the initial need for justice in their crime-filled city.

The only character with any depth is Paul Schmeck (Willem Defoe,) an arrogant but brilliant gay cop who hates and fears his fellow homosexuals, even as they find themselves in his bed. I fear this happens far too often, when 'straight guys' find the need for man-love, but still aren't willing to take on the stigma of being 'gay.'

Initially, Schmeck wants nothing more to catch the McManus brothers, who the sympathetic masses have dubbed the 'Saints.' But as the Russian Mobsters start dropping like flies, Schmeck starts to believe that maybe the 'Saints' aren't so detrimental after all. This could be an interesting revelation, except for the way it's done, which is just silly.

Along with Schmeck's arrogant brilliance and the brother's gleeful responses to the bloodletting, a lot of hyperkinetic fight scenes proceed. I just didn't buy our protagonists as badasses, and I'm not a fan of stylized violence unless it is directed by one man- Tarantino. The Russian characters were extremely stereotypical and one of them, 'Boris' had the corniest lines.

I know I'm going to offend a lot of people with this review, but "The Boondock Saints" wasn't my cup of tea. Many people may really like it, but I felt it was a simplistic, shallow, and meaningless excursion into something we've all felt like doing (vigilantism,) but without the courage of it's convictions to make us care about it's characters. And don't even get me started about a cross-dressing Defoe passing as a woman. Just... don't.


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Mothers

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 15 August 2013 09:20 (A review of Lion’s Den)

Argentinean director Pablo Trapero's fifth film, "Leonera" ("Lion's Den,") takes on the underutilized subject of motherhood behind bars. After a sketchy altercation with results in her lover's death, pregnant Julia (very nicely played by Martina Gusman) is convicted of murder and sent to a prison for female offenders with young children.

If not for the alliance of gay prisoner Marta (Laura García,) Julia would quickly become a victim of the predatory mothers of the ward, but tension rises when the baby is born and Julia's mother (Elli Medeiros) wants to take him home.

It's a bizarre set-up- babies and children living behind bars with their convict mothers, witnessing daily cruelty and catfights from an early age. What crime have these children committed, but being born to the wrong mother? Yet they must live among them like outlaws.

Throughout the movie, the same thought occurred to me- who would do this to a child? Unless their foster home consists of the cast of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre," what could be worse than being subjected to this? Surely a infertile Christian housewife would beat a childhood in the slammer.

Still, Martina Gusman brings a lot of credibility and a sensitivity to what is otherwise a rather selfish character. The pace is quick and the plot unpredictable, and the film wisely chooses not to answer certain questions such as, 'what exactly happened between Julia and her boyfriend,' and 'Does Julia accept Marta's advances because she is turned on by them, or because she simply does not know what else to do?'

The main cast is surprisingly strong; the supporting cast is a little weaker, but doesn't hold the film back too much. You may recognize Rodrigo Santoro, playing Julia's husband's friend Ramiro, as Laura Linney's sweet, shy suitor in "Love Actually."

"Lion's Den" is a thought-provoking depiction of the self-centered things parents will do to keep their children close to them, and Martina Gusman gives a memorable performance as a Mama Lion trying to keep herself and her son together no matter what. It is worth watching for it's incisive lead performance and nonjudgmental portrayal of it's subjects. Though, I can't help thinking, a bit more judgement of these ladies might be in order.


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Rushed & Forgettable

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 15 August 2013 08:39 (A review of North Sea Texas)

Back in the 50's and 60's, any movie that dealt with gay themes was radical and ahead of it's time. A GLBT film didn't have to be insightful or even particularly good- the filmmaker was risking his credibility and his career just putting himself (or herself) out there.

Now, however, things have changed- with entire gay film companies making movies available at the click of a button, directors of these movie must not merely be willing to make movies- they must be the best they can be, and no less. Movies about the gay experience are in high demand, and makers and distributors of these films don't need to be afraid anymore.

There have been some extraordinary films made about gay issues the last few years- "Weekend," "Tomboy," "Pariah," and "Gun Hill Road," to name of few... and Belgian filmmaker Bavo Defurne's "North Sea Texas" has garnered some acclaim. Unfortunately, "North Sea Texas" is a disappointment, marred by uninteresting characters and a rushed pace.

Pim (Jelle Florizoone), a pixyish, and disturbingly, often meagerly clothed teenage boy, is first seen played by Ben Van den Heuvel as a child, putting on a sash and a tiara for his own enjoyment. The son of a irresponsible mother (Eva van der Gucht) and a father who has long been out of the picture, Pim longs to escape is dull life. Mom is a frequent visitor of the 'Texas' tavern, where she and her boyfriend get liquored up.

As a fifteen-year-old, Pim hates his mother's loutish boyfriend but loves Gino (Mathias Vergels,) his boy neighbor and best friend. Unfortunately, Gino's sister Sabrina (Nina Marie Kortekaas) is in love with Pim, and can't understand why Pim shows more interest in her motorcycle-riding brother.

When Gino breaks Pim's heart and leaves, a love triangle develops between Pim, his mom, and handsome Gypsy Zoltan (Thomas Coumans.) But Pim's trials are not over, and his painful experiences lead to a eventual reconciliation.

I never really cared about Pim or any of the other characters- I guess that was one of the main problems with this film. Pim was nothing special- just your average soft, sensitive gay boy with a affinity for walking around unclothed. His apparent youth made his sexualization at the hands of the filmmaker seem somewhat skeevy.

Gino was a unsatisfying romantic interest who was willing to betray Pim just to go "Yeah, I'm straight" to the rest of the world. I didn't like him either. Sabrina was okay, but she was a bit of a whiny busybody brat. I mean, who just goes into a person they like's room and starts browsing through papers?

The only things I liked about "North Sea Texas" were the decision to cast a fat person as Pim's mother, Pim's performance, and the scene at the end where Pim and Sabrina comes to a silent truce. Otherwise, the movie was startlingly mediocre, and I hope you'll take a pass on this one in order to watch a more worthy likewise-themed movie.


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True-to-Life, Affecting Tale

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 13 August 2013 06:28 (A review of Wendy and Lucy)

This movie is not for everyone. Curious art-indie buffs, you know who you are, others, look elsewhere. "Wendy and Lucy" is 'real' in such a way that it will delight a certain audience and bore the pants off everyone else.

Drifter Wendy (Michelle Williams,) camping out in Oregon on her way to find work in Alaska, travels alone except for her beloved dog, Lucy. So when Lucy goes missing in a small po-dunk Oregon town, Wendy vows not to leave until she finds her best friend and traveling companion.

Invested in her plight is a kind, otherwise unnamed Security Guard (Wally Dalton) who doesn't seem to do much work but instead gives her advice and comfort while she tries to find her dog. Wendy comes into contact with other people, some helpful, some detrimental, and in the end must make a painful and difficult choice.

Although the grainy imagery can be a little frustrating, "Wendy and Lucy" is a touching, and above all, real little tale. It's the kind of film that doesn't have a hook, but wins us over with it's true-to-life characters and situations, and makes us wonder what's going to happen.

Michelle Williams is extremely convincing as flawed protagonist Wendy, and Lucy is a very cute and charming canine. This is the kind of movie people will argue has no 'point.' Since when does a film have to have a lesson, a glossy twist ending, or an revelation at before the end credits?

Isn't a depiction of real, believable people and honest plot developments enough to to keep the audience watching? Since when did we become a legion of people who need a robot, a superhero, farting animated animals, or a masked killer to keep us invested in a story? Maybe I sound pretentious. But I can't help but wonder if peoples' interest in the movies are regressing, along with people in general.

I've seen Michelle Williams in two movies recently. "Take This Waltz" had it's moments, but was also often glib and sitcom-ish, despite a painfully effective ending. "Wendy and Lucy," the more effective of the two films, was never unbelievable, never simplistic, a testament to the power of kitchen sink realism in film.

"Weend and Lucy" also excels in the way that it portrays poverty without the morbid vision of filth and decay many movies strive for. Overall, it's more "Winter's Bone" than "Requiem for a Dream," and delivers pathos and sympathy rather than cheap shocks.

Not that it doesn't have tense moments, such as when Wendy sleeps in the woods and comes face to face with an unexpected intruder. It just doesn't overplay it's hand trying to be disgusting and gratuitous, and portraying Williams as a wretched drifting waif. I hope you see it.


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Now This is REAL Horror...

Posted : 3 years, 10 months ago on 11 August 2013 08:35 (A review of Antichrist)

I was apprehensive about seeing "Antichrist", but not primarily for the reason that you might expect. Yes, the film's allegations of rampant misogyny (not a new accusation for controversial filmmaker Lars Von Trier) and graphic violence were daunting, but I also heard that the Von Trier's new work was linked thematically to "Melancholia," a film I found almost unbearably aloof and pretentious.

I am, however, a fan of the director's earlier works "Dancer in the Dark," and especially, "Breaking the Waves" (the film that made me fall irrevocably in love with Emily Watson, so I decided to give this one a go. This movie didn't make me fall in love with anybody, least of all the characters (thought the acting is very good.) It more made me want to hit something. Or crawl into a fetal position and cry. Either or.

Not that "Antichrist" is a bad movie. It's certainly a well-made one. Williem Defoe and Charlotte Gainsburg act their heart out as the otherwise unnamed He and She. It's just... let me put it this way. Von Trier was in a period of deep depression during the conception of this film. The production was a disaster. Lars Von Trier's hands shook as he held the camera. To see this movie is to take a close look into it's creator's tormented soul.

Don't watch this movie if you have a weak stomach. On second thought, don't watch this movie if you have anxiety, panic attacks, a love of children (the cute, cherubic youngster kicks it pretty early on in this dark story,) or if you want to have a normal, functional life and healthy relationships. This coming from the girl who laughed at "The Human Centipede II" and was barely fazed by Haneke's "Funny Games."

I know. By building it up, I'm just making you want to watch it more, so I stop here. It's like the Mormons who tell you "Don't watch that, it's filth!" So you go see it, naturally. The thing is, I'm not telling you not to see it. I'm just saying, tread carefully. What might be harmless for one person could be the last straw on the road to a mental breakdown.

In a visually rapturous black-and-white opening, He and She (Williem Defoe and Charlotte Gainsburg) have passionate sex while their infant son, Nic, escapes from his crib and falls out the window (the similarities between Nic's fate and the death of Eric Clapton's son need not be mentioned.)

She collapses at the funeral and is taken to hospital. In He's infinite wisdom, he pulls She out of the care of the custody of the government and decides to take her to the place that she fears the much (Trust me- I'm a therapist)- the woods. To be specific, one place in the woods- 'Eden,' a place She went with her son to write a thesis.

Almost immediately, She's verbal taunts begin- He wasn't there, he is indifferent to his son's death, he's cold and distant. Meanwhile, nightmares start to penetrate Eden's placid exterior. And they're not the only things doing so when He and She engage in weird, compulsive sex acts and mind games.

I didn't love "Antichrist"- I'm not even sure I liked it, but it taps into a sense of primal fear like few films I've ever watched. However, the meaning is as obscure as the film is unnerving. One thing I notice is the unsexiness of intercourse and the frequent use of sex as a temporary distraction and means to an end. Does this mean the film's theme revolves around sexual politics? I don't know? The meaning is akin to an unsolvable problem.

"Antichrist" is not fun, entertaining, or easy, but as it gets under your skin and creates a creeping sense of dread, a certain respect for it must be retained. Because Lars Von Trier isn't fun, entertaining, or easy, but he pours out the dark contents of his heart for the world to see, and finds strength in the darkness.



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